Contents

Ah, donkeys, always the butt of the joke. Or the ass, if you may. This is the whimsical world of donkey puns, where the humor is as brayingly loud as a donkey’s call! Did you know that donkeys have an incredible sense of self-preservation? They won’t do something they perceive as dangerous, which is probably why they’re known for their stubbornness. But fear not! Here, we celebrate their delightful obstinacy with a laugh or two.

For instance, why did the donkey get kicked out of the bar? Because he kept saying, “I’ll drink to that… and that… and that!” Or how about this classic: What do you call a donkey with one leg? A wonky donkey! Whether you’re trotting through a field of puns or braying with laughter at their absurdity, these clever one liners will have you rolling in the hay.

So saddle up, hold on tight, and prepare for a ride through the most a-moo-sing donkey puns you’ve ever heard. After all, life is too short not to have a little fun – ass-specially when you can kick it up a notch with some donkey humor! Let’s not be stubborn; it’s time to have a good hee-haw laugh!

Donkey Puns

Don-key – A farm animal that can open locks.
Don-key – Head of donkey mafia.
Don’t-key – A negative donkey.
Don-qi – The circulating life force in a Chinese philosophy for donkeys.
Don-quiche – An egg and mule tart.
Donkeyn’ Donuts – Every donkey’s favourite donut shop.
Don Key-xote – Every mule’s favourite story.
Don Key-dle – The famous donkey who plays Rhodey in Marvel movies.
Dunk-ey – When you dip your oreos in a donkey.
Dung-key – Shitty donkey.
Donkey-roos – Every little donkey’s favourite cookie snack.
Slam Dunk-ey – When you jump up and push a donkey into a basketball net.
Dung-key – A stinky poopy donkey.
Ding-dong-key – The sound when you press a donkey.
Monkey – Uhh…not a donkey?
Monk-ey – A religious donkey in a monastery.
Prima Donna-key – Donkey that expects special treatment.
Wonkey – A donkey with only three legs.
Wongkey – Chinese donkey.
Wongkey – Chinese donkey singing out of tune.

Donkey Related Puns

Get ready to bray with laughter as we dive into the delightful world of donkey puns! Why did the donkey cross the road? He brayed for God to watch over him! Or how about this one: What do you get when you cross a donkey with a computer? An ass with a brain! And let’s not forget the infamous donkey-mentary about their lives – it’s a real tail of adventure! If you’re feeling a bit low, just remember: life is like a donkey; it has its ups and downs, but if you give it a good kick, you might just find some hidden treasures. So, if you’re ever feeling a bit ass-tounded, just whip out a donkey pun and watch the giggles come galloping in! After all, laughter is the best medicine, especially when it comes with a hefty dose of donkey charm!

Mule Puns

A-mule-sing – Funny donkey jokes.
A-mule-sing – A musical, melodic, donkey.
A-mulet – A charm that protects a donkey from misfortune.
Muletide – Christmas for donkeys.
Mule-titude – Many donkeys.
Mule-tiny – Donkeys rebelling against the head donkey.
Mule-berry – Donkeys favorite berry.
Mule-tiply – Donkeys making little donkeys.
Mule-cous – The scientific term for donkey boogers.
Mule-tant – A genetically modified donkey.
Teenage Mule-tant Ninja Turtles – A band of crimefighting half-donkey half-turtle brothers.
Mule-ligatawyny (Mulligatawny) – A donkey’s favourite South Indian soup.
Mulet – The most stylish haircut for donkeys in the 80s and 90s.
Mulet – If a donkey and a mullet fish had a baby.
Mewl – What baby kittens call donkeys.
Mool – A cow calling for his friend, a donkey.
Moule – A unit for how much power a donkey can produce.
Mule-d Wine – Every donkey’s favourite wine around Christmastime.
Mule-ett Packard – A multinational information technology company for donkeys.
Sa-mule – Eli’s donkey apprentice in the Bible.
O-mule-ette – Fried agg and donkey.
Tokyo Mule – Japanese supernatural manga and anime starring a donkey.
You can’t pull the mule over my eyes.

Ass Puns

Ass-cuses – What little donkeys spew out to avoid getting in trouble.
Ass-paragus – A donkey and vegetable hybrid.
Ass-timate – When you roughly think it’s a donkey, but are not exactly sure.
Ass-ton Martin – Luxury cars for donkeys to drive.
Ad Ass-tra – Donkey latin for “To The Stars”.
Ass-tronaut – A donkey lost in space.
Ass-throw-nut – A donkey throwing nuts out of a rocket ship.
Ass-assin – A lethal donkey.
Ass-vocado – A green donkey or stupid avocado.
Ass-et – A very useful donkey.
Ass-countant – A donkey that’s good with numbers.
Ass-cordion – A donkey’s favourite folk music instrument.
Ass-trology – Donkey horoscopes.
Ass-tronomy – Study of donkeys in space.
G-ass-tronomy – Art of dining with donkeys.
Bi-assed – An unfair donkey.
Bi-assed – Someone with two donkeys.
Bi-assed – Donkey with two butts.
Bluegr-ass – A donkey’s favourite type of music.
Comp-ass – Donkeys with impeccable sense of direction.
Mol-asses – 6.02 x 10^23 donkeys.
Ren-ass-ance – A period in European history where donkeys transitioned to modernity.
Smartass – A bright donkey!
Sassafr-ass – A donkey’s favourite sweet plant.
S-ass-y – Cheeky donkey.
Everything’s going ass-cording to plan.
Don’t be afraid to ass questions.
Be ass-tremely subtle, even to the point of formlessness.
Somethings are better half-assed than not done at all.

Burro Puns

Burro-to – A donkey wrapped in a tortilla.
Burro Market – A donkey’s favourite fresh food market in London.
Middlesburro – A town in England where donkeys live.
Burro-ta – A donkey’s favourite cheese!
Burro-w – A hole in the ground where donkeys live.
Cinammon Burros – Deep fried donkeys coated in cinammon sugar.
Wheel-burro – If you stuck a donkey to a bicycle.
Hinny-ta – Every otaku donkey’s favourite Naruto character.
Hinny Weasley – Every little donkey’s favourite girl Harry Potter character.
Hinny The Pooh – A lesser known donkey from the Hundred Acre Woods.
Neddy Longbottom – Every little donkey’s favourite boy Harry Potter character.
Neddy Redmayne – Every donkey’s favourite actor.
Are you neddy to rumble?
Help the poor and neddy.

More Donkey Related Puns

Bray-ve – A courageous donkey.
Braybe – What donkeys affectionately call their significant other.
Bray-by – A small donkey.
Bray-by Got Back – Every donkey’s favourtie rap song.
Bray-by Come Back – Any kinda mule could see, I was wrong and I just can’t live without you.
Bray-fish – If a donkey and a crayfish had a baby.
The Bray-dy Bunch – A donkey’s favourite sitcom.
Bray Watch – A TV series with hot donkey lifeguards.
Bray-onet – Donkey dagger.
A-bray-zing – A donkey’s favourite adjective!
Cele-bray-tion – A donkey party.
Um-bray-lla – What donkeys use to protect themsleves from harsh weather.
Um-bray-lla – A donkey’s favourite Rihanna song.
Furrytail – Stories that mommy donkeys tell little mules before bedtime.
Tattle-tail – A snitchy donkey.
Re-tail Store – Where donkeys get new tails after losing old ones.
De-tails – Information about donkeys.
De-tail – When you take a donkey’s tail off in a game of “Pin The Tail On The Donkey”.
Tail-ented – A donkey with a bright future.
Tail-or – A donkey who sews.
Tail Mail – Letters for donkeys.
Tail Mix – Camping snacks for donkeys.
Tailor Moon – Little donkeys’ favourite Japanese animated series.
New Ears – A donkey’s favourite holiday!
Ear-odynamic – A fast flying donkey.
Ear-ythromycin – Antibiotics for donkeys.
Ear-benezer Scrooge – A donkey that didn’t like Christmas.
Ear-onaut – Donkeys that can pilot aircrafts.
Ear-nest – A sincere donkey.
Ear-robics – Cardio exercise for donkeys.
Ear-oplane – How donkeys get across the sea.
Ear-osol – Donkey spray!
Ear-craft – What donkeys use to fly.
Ear-plane – How donkeys like to travel these days.
Ear-port – Central traveling hub for donkeys.
Ear-row – Sharp pointy object shot with a bow used by donkeys in archery.
Ear-row – A directional sign to show donkeys where to go.
Hoove-rcraft – A floating donkey.
Hoof-lepuff – The yellow Hogwarts house.
Hoof-falump – A mysterious creature also from the Hundred Acre Woods.
Hee-haw – How donkeys greet cowboys.
Hee-hawk – What donkeys call giant birds.
Hee-honk – What the horns in a donkey’s car sound like.
He Haw – A donkey accusing someone of haw-ing.
Hee Ha – A donkey’s laugh.
Tee Haw – How donkeys giggle.
Yam-Hee-Haw – A donkey’s favourite motorcycle brand.
Yam-Hee-Haw – Also a donkey’s favourite piano brand.
Mane-atee – If a donkey and a manatee had a baby.
Mane-caroni and Cheese – A donkey in your bowl of pasta.
Mane-ila – A donkey’s favourite place to visit in the Philippines.
Stop bray-ting (berating) me!
I’m all ears!
I’m ear for you.
Light-ears away, the donkey empire wages war.
There is an ear-ie (eerie) vibe about this forest.
The wife of the donkey gave him and ear-ful.
Just hoof do you think you are?
The Hoover Dam.
The hoof is in the pudding.
The Fiddler On The Hoof.
I’m the mane man!
Entrée, mane, and dessert.
It’s not easy to mane-tain such fabulous hair.
Donkeys are high mane-tenance creatures.

Donkey Jokes

If you’re looking for a laugh, you’ve come to the right pasture! Donkey jokes are the perfect way to lighten the mood and bring out your inner goofball. Why did the donkey fly into space? Because he wanted to become an ass-tronaut! And why are donkeys religious? They’re always braying! Speaking of sounds, why do donkeys make great musicians? Donkeys make great comedians, because these four-legged jokesters are always kickin’ it up with their hilarious antics! So grab a seat, and get ready to enjoy the best of donkey humor, because it’s bound to make you hee-haw with delight!

Q: What did the donkey do when he got cut-off?
A: Hee-Hawnked.

Q: What do you call a bunch of upper-class British gentlemen bereft of donkeys?
A: Assless Chaps.

Q: What do you get when you cross a donkey and a zebra?
A: Debra.

Q: When do donkeys have six legs?
A: When they’re being ridden!

Q: Why are donkeys, monkeys, and turkeys similar?
A: They all have keys.

Q: Where do you find a donkey with no legs?
A: Right where you left him!

Q: How does Winnie The Pooh paddle his boat?
A: With Eey-ores.

Q: Why did the donkey cross the road?
A: Because the chicken was on holiday!

Q: What happens when your carrying a donkey and you chuckle so hard you drop him?
A: You’re laughing your ass off.

Q: What do you call a donkey throwing nuts to the moon?
A: An ass throw nut (astronaut).

Q: What do you call a donkey with one leg ?
A: Wonkey.

Q: What do you call a donkey in the Arctic?
A: Lost.

Q: What do you call a donkey with one leg and a bad eye ?
A: A winkeywonkey.

Q: What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye while breaking wind ?
A: A stinkeywinkeywonkey.

Q: What is a mule’s favorite novel?
A: Donkey-xote.

Q: What’s the difference between a teeter-totter on a ranch and a donkey’s grandpa?
A: One’s a yee-haw seesaw and the other is a hee-haw pee-paw.

Q: Which is the coldest animal?
A: I’m not sure. Alaska donkey

My friend got killed by a donkey. Some say he was assassinated.
My stupid, hungry donkey decided to eat a window. It was a huge pane in the ass.
As a commercial livestock hauler, my main responsibility is transporting donkeys.My clientshave their asses handed to them.
I was gonna tell you a joke I came up with about a were-donkey,but I decided it was too half-assed.
I run a meditation and yoga studio for angry donkeys.It’s called “Peace of ass”.
I hear that Chad Kroeger from Nickelback, absolutely loves to take part in Nativity plays. He’s played a shepherd, the inn keeper and one year, he even played the rear end of the donkey…But he never made it as a wise man.
I once knew a Formula 1 driver who had a day job trucking donkeys.He was never a good driver, but he hauled ass!
Man, asking his wife “How many teeth does a donkey have?”
Wife: I don’t know honey, look in the mirror, open your mouth, and count them.
The donkey once asked the Persian horse, “Do you play any instruments?”. The horse replied, “Nay.”
A donkey walks into a bar, and the bartender says, “Hey!” The donkey replies, “Aah, you read my mind!”
Tom: I lost my donkey.
Sarah: Why don’t you put an advert in the newspaper?
Tom: Don’t be silly, he can’t read!
Me: I think it’s safe to assume we are both donkeys.
My friend: Careful, you know what happens when you assume.
Me: Exactly.
Patient: Every night for the past month and a half, I have dreams of wrestling matches with donkeys.
Doctor: Take these pills, and your dreams will go away.
Patient: Can I start taking them tomorrow?
Doctor: Why?
Patient: Because I’m scheduled to wrestle in the championship match tonight.
Doctor: How’s the stutter?
Patient: It’s g-getting better but my friend calls me D-Donkey.
Doctor: Any idea why
Patient: No, but he-aw he-awhe-aw he always calls me that.
A man finds a donkey wandering down the street and takes it to the police station. The policeman says, “Why don’t you just take it to the petting farm?” The next day, the man walks down the street with the donkey again. “I thought I told you to take that donkey to the farm,” the policeman says. “I did,” the man replies. “Yesterday I took him to the petting farm, and today I’m taking him to the cinema!”
There were two donkeys in a field. The first donkey said “hee-haw!” and the second donkey said “moooo.” The first donkey asked the second, “why did you say moooo?” The second donkey said, “I’m learning a foreign language.”
A farmer kept a donkey in a stable, but the donkey’s ears were so long that they repeatedly hit the top of the door, causing the animal to kick out dangerously. So, the farmer decided to raise the height of the door frame.

He spent all day toiling away with his hacksaw. Seeing that he was struggling to complete the task, his neighbour suggested: “Instead of lifting the door frame, wouldn’t it be easier if you simply dug out the ground in the doorway and made it deeper?”

“Don’t be an idiot,” said the farmer. “It’s the donkey’s ears that are too long, not his legs!”
A man bought a donkey from a preacher. The preacher told the man that this donkey had been trained in a unique way (being the donkey of a preacher). The only way to make the donkey go, is to say, “Hallelujah!”. The only way to make the donkey stop, is to say, “Amen!”
The man was pleased with his purchase and immediately got on the animal to try out the preacher’s instructions.“Hallelujah!” shouted the man. The donkey began to trot.“Amen!” shouted the man. The donkey stopped immediately.

“This is great!” said the man. With a “Hallelujah” he rode off, very proud of his new purchase.The man travelled for a long time through the mountains. As he headed towards a cliff, he tried to remember the word to make the donkey stop.

“Stop,” said the man. “Halt!” he cried. The donkey just kept going.“Oh, no!”

“Bible…Church!Please! Stop!!,” shouted the man. The donkey just began to trot faster. He was getting closer and closer to the edge of the cliff.

Finally, in desperation, the man said a prayer…” Please, dear Lord. Please make this donkey stop before I go off the end of this mountain, In Jesus name, AMEN.”

The donkey came to an abrupt stop just one step from the edge of the cliff.“HALLELUJAH!” shouted the man.
Two brothers were arguing on which of the two donkeys was theirs,so the first brother says, “I’ll cut an ear off my donkey and the donkey with only one ear will be mine. You take the other one”. So,they came to an agreement. At night, the donkey with one ear looks at the other donkey with two ears in jealousy, and he ends up biting its ear off.
The next morning the brothers start arguing again, one of the brothers said, “Alright! I’ll cut off a donkey’s second ear and the donkey with no ears is mine. You take the other one.” So, they came to an agreement. The donkey with no ears gets jealous and bites the other donkey’s last ear off.

Morning comes the brothers are mad and arguing. One of the brothers says, “This is what we’ll do, I’ll cut off my donkeys tail and the other one with a tail will be yours.” So, they came to an agreement. That night the same thing happens the donkey with no tail gets jealous and bites the other donkey’s tail off.

The morning comes both brothers are mad. One brother finally yells, “Alright!Fine how about you take the black donkey and I take the brown one!”

And there you have it – proof that donkey puns and jokes are un-bray-lievably funny! Whether you’re cracking up with friends or just trying to stall for time, these jokes always hit the mark. Donkeys may have a reputation for being stubborn, but their humor knows no bounds. So the next time someone says you’re making an ass of yourself, just tell them you’re embracing the fun! After all, a good laugh is like a donkey – unexpected, loud, and contagious. Keep those puns in your back pocket ready to kick-start any conversation. Until next time, stay punny and bray on!